Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Start Again.

It’s 12:08am, I can’t sleep, even I already worked for the whole day. When I came home at 11pm from MIC, the same security guard greeted me, then I replied “Good Night~” as usual. This is already the N times I work over 10pm.

I am happy to work there, sincerely, because I learn a lot of things. Handling almost half of the project, without any supervisor to teach me, or senior to ask, only Google. Sometimes really scare, worry I can’t meet the expectation of my boss, worry I can’t submit on time, so little time, so many things to do, cover from programming, designing, upgrading, all. I am tired, but happy.

Different from assignment in campus, now I need to concern security, performance, reusability, design issue etc. If you screwed up assignment in campus, you only get little bit less mark; you screw up the project, thousands of people will be screwed too.

OK, enough of the stupid work.

Really emo these days. It’s not from my work, and I know the reason, just I don’t know what to do, who to tell. It’s really stupid, till I feel that telling other just make people feel that I am so so so god damn stupid. Why for a simple thing that many people so easily can done it, I just can’t? Because want to protect this important treasure, I had tried so hard, or I did something wrong, or not enough?. Always remind myself, I am lucky enough, but how long can this works?


Out of no reason, I started another 1 month of Vegetarian food. Wish I can learn something valuable after this month.

Good night. Tomorrow is my deadline.

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Bob. said...

bugger. you need to talk.

Jeryl said...

work hard! u can make it =)
i really like ur passion to ur work though..
keep it on~! =)

VHanded Cheepeng said...

Bob: haiya, no don't know how to say.

Jeryl: Thanks! Work for what you love.

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